second-time
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Second Time Around – An Online Event with Rabbi Manis Friedman (Jan 8, 2015)

There is something valuable and powerful about a second marriage – that Rabbi Friedman, in this online talk, likens to the second set of tablets inscribed with the Ten Commandments that Moses brought down from Mount Sinai for the Jewish people.
 
The first set of tablets were given with great fanfare and excitement, but they didn’t last. Moses had to break them. 
 
Then Moses went up the mountain again for 40 days and 40 nights, and came down with the second set of tablets. This time though, it was a more modest affair, more subdued – with a lasting power that the first one didn’t have. Even though the first tablets will never be completely replaced, the second time around – like the second tablets – can and should be, in many ways, better and stronger than the first.
 
In the same way, there should be no doubt, no hesitation that a second marriage is meant to be; the second time is not any less valuable, nor any less real, nor any less true, nor any less divine and meant to be. Proceed with confidence that things will be good.

 

What are the three most important things to look for in a man? What are the three most important things in a marriage? (7:20)

 

How do we prepare ourselves for remarriage? (7:35)

 

Why remarry? (1:35)

 

How do you know if he’s the right one? (3:36)

 

If you’re considering marrying a divorced man is it important to know the circumstances of his divorce? (1:31)

 

How long should you date, from the time you meet until the time you marry? (1:29)

 

How do you present yourself as a potential marriage partner if you have specific issues, for instance in health, that mean you’re not functioning at your best? (1:54)

 

Where do you meet your husband and how? Should we go on dating sites, tell people we’re looking – make it a job? (1:10)

 

What about dating men who’ve been divorced or widowed or never married – what are the differences, what should you look out for? (0:37)

 

How do you avoid gossip when explaining how your own marriage failed? (0:56)

 

One final bit of advice: Don’t underestimate your own strength and value. Expect a guy to appreciate you. (1:01)

 

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